Is First Love Real?
They say first love never succeeds. I believe in this. I believe that even if you end up with your first love, it is never quite the love that you had when you first fell in love.
First love is pure, innocent, brave, unreasonable... a total immersion. It happens when you are young. You have no bills to pay, career to think about or future to secure. All you think about is the now, what you have going right at that moment. That's why you are totally able to give yourself to love.
You fall in love with the other person who, more often than not, is also in that same state of mind. You meet at that time when mornings meant another day, not another work day. You have so much vacant spots inside of you to fill and you are innocent enough to just trust fully.
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So, you just enjoy the moment. You discover the elation and since it is the first time you experience it, you experience it with the eyes of an innocent child. You accept it with no question, no doubt.
When you grow up and life happens, disappointments, pain, people and life disappoint you. You disappoint them back and you get hurt and you hurt other people and all those things change you.
You learn to take precautions to avoid feeling so much pain. You learn to put distance between you and other people to spare yourself possible betrayals. You learn to put walls to keep secrets of past mistakes. You learn to throw away things, memories and connections in order to forgive your past and people from your past.
So when you love, you love with reservations. You love with full knowledge of possible ugly realities. You love fully aware of the all the possibilities, good and bad. You love with a bruised past, bruised heart and brused soul. Those bruises and the memories connected to it naturally push you a bit farther away from the other person.
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SO yeah, first love never succeeds but maybe... just maybe... that doesn't matter. What matters is love, whether it is first, second, third, 30th... as long as it is love, in the best way you know how to give... what matters is that there is love and that it succeeds.