Because You're The One Without a Family, You Need to...

You gotta love Pinoy family culture. I mean... the whole culture is frustrating, unreasonable and absolutely juvenile but you just gotta love it. God created families to keep us all insane in times of sanity and in times of insanity, our families keep us even more insane.

I remember growing up and being told by my parents to study hard, don't get pregnant outside of wedlock, choose the right guy, save for the future, experience the world or I will have a hard time when I am older. They said I will have a shitty life when I grow old if I mess up my youth. They said I will have no one to rely on and I can't ask for anyone's help when that happens because people have their own lives to live.

They told me that I must get my shit together or my shit will hit the fan. It's going to be disgusting and it's my ass that will be f$%^ed.

So... I did pull my shit together. And I turned out okay.

Then, my sister and cousins who didn't pull their shit together started scattering their shit all over the place. Guess who gets a call to help cover up some of their shit... yup! Me... the girl who pulled her shit together.

When their child has to go to the hospital because and they don't have the money to pay for a decent care, I get call because I am the one who is not married, has some savings and doesn't seem to have anything to spend on. I am the one who has no family so I should be the one to help.

So why the f$%^ did I spend my youth pulling my shit together when I could have messed it up and then just ask for someone's help eventually?

I am not saying I don't want to help. Those are my nieces and nephews, of course I will help, but for the life of me, I can't figure out why we tolerate it. They got themselves in that shit, they should know how to get out of it. When they were out having fun, sleeping around and experimenting with whatever they experimented with, they didn't think of me and said "I have a cousin out there who is working her butt out right now. I should go to her and give her a bottle of wine." Nope! They didn't do that.

I was the farthest thing from their mind... like, there's the last thing in their mind, right? There's about 10 layers of shit after the last thing in their mind. Add another 10 feet of nothingness... then there's me. And then, now that they need help, I'm like centerpiece. I'm the quarterback, the choir leader... the darn god of their universe.

All because I am the one who is not married.


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