Let me clarify this. When we (my ex and I) started “flirting” and, eventually, dating, I had no idea he was still hanged up on his ex-girlfriend. Looking back, I should have known. His history with the girl was epic. He was the girl’s other man for more than three years. In fact, when the girl got pregnant, there was some confusion as to who was the father.
During that time, he - let’s give him a name, let’s call him Bert - already knew the girl was going to marry the original boyfriend but he still stayed with her until the last minute.
When I met Bert, the girl hasn’t given birth yet and throughout the pregnancy, he took care of her (they were working in the same office). Looking back, it was stupid of me to not even entertain the possibility he was still hanged up on her. But we have long established that I am stupid when it comes to relationship. So, that’s not exactly breaking news.
However, you can learn from my experience. Here are some tips on how you will determine if he is not over his ex yet.
When he starts describing his ex-girlfriend as his ideal type, he is probably not over the ex yet
I never personally met Bert’s ex-girlfriend (Let’s call her Sushmita) but I have heard some things about her and I’ve seen her picture. I never really paid attention on how she looked because I simply wasn’t interested.
During our “flirting stage”, however, Bert and I got to talk about his “ideal type” physically. He said he like someone with big cheeks, long hair, looks great with a baseball cap, etc.
Time went on and after we broke up, I looked at the photo of Sushmita. I realized that she had big cheeks, long hair and looks great with a baseball cap. The bastard described his ex-girlfriend to me and I didn’t even know.
So, ladies, it’s important you know what the ex-girlfriend looks like.
When he wants to be the father of his ex-girlfriend’s child, he is not over his ex yet
As I previously mentioned, Bert worked in the same office as Sushmita. She was on her third month of pregnancy when they broke up. He took care of her when she was pregnant.
When the child was born, he literally wanted to get back with her because he “loved” the child. We were already together then.
When your boyfriend feels that for his ex-girlfriend’s child, he is most likely not over her yet.
When she tells him “you are my world” and he defends her action to you, he is most likely not over her yet
I wasn’t even going to make it an issue. After all, it was her telling him and not the other way around. I was going to ignore it until he gave me a call and said she’s just really a sweet persona and I shouldn’t get upset at her.
Well, I wasn’t gonna… until now! How on earth did he end up defending her to me when I wasn’t even doing anything? He has gone mad.
So, if he ends up defending his ex-girlfriend to you when you’re not even upset, he is most likely not over her yet.
When he offers to drive his friends for six hours to visit the ex-girlfriend while he stays in the car, he is most likely not over her yet
When the girl gave birth, their office friends wanted to visit but didn’t know where she lived. She lived three hours away (on a good day) and he offered to drive them while he stayed in the car. He couldn’t go in because, as mentioned in the opening paragraph, he was the other man and the original boyfriend learned of his existence and identity.
When he offers to drive his friends that far just to see the girl, he is most likely not over her yet.
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