Tricks on How to Get Away with Trafic Violations

I've never had a traffic ticket but there have been a number of times when I actually have come close but, obviously, I was able to get away from each of them. Here are some tricks that I use.

1) Beg

The one thing that women have and men doesn't is the ability to beg for mercy while being cute. Blame it on the chromosomes but it's just how it is. We can beg and look pitiful while we maintain some cuteness. Believe me, I'm the last person you will call cute but when the need arises, the guddam cute DNA surfaces.

2) Pretend to not speak the native language

I usually pretend to speak spanish and poor english. Sometimes, I pretend to speak english only. After several minute so stuttering, the officer will most likely soften up. He will also most likely ask you where in the US you grew up and if he could get his hand on a NBA jerseys.

3) Be arrogant

Explose the mintue the officer approaches your car. Get angry before he does. Unahan lang 'yan.

4) Run away

This is extremely effective. The secret is in spotting police officers who have lazy asses and there are a lot of them around. They're not going to get on their asses to run after you. They'll sit their ass right where they are wait for the next violation.

5) Pretend it's not you

An officer told me I was beating the red light. I wasn't. My front wheels were passed the gutter when the light turn orange, I had to go. But that's up for debate. Anyway, the officer signalled me to pull over the other side. I pulled over and sat comfortably. When he approached me, I acted shocked. I asked what the deal was and he told me I was beating the red light. I told him it's not possible because I've been parked there for five minutes. He must have mistaken me with another car just like mine who just passed speeding.

6) Cry

Tell him about your life problems. Tell him your boyfriend just left you and cry. Cry to him. Don't forget to give details and be very graphic.

Each of those things sound silly but each has proven to be effective. God bless this country.


Popular posts from this blog

Do You Wish You Are Younger?

Jabbawockeez, Ben Chung and America's Best Dance Crew

30 Reasons I'm Still Single in my 30s